Tid-bits and strange ones.

This is the post where I share little pieces of random first dates. Poor dates, they don't even command their own posts. Well, read on.....................


Depressed Guy.
I met dude at a bar. Usually I go into a date with the highest hopes, but sometimes I go knowing I'm probably not going to like them, but there is always that 1% chance.....
So, this was part of that 1%.
He told me he much preferred New York to LA (we have that much in common) because New York is a better place to be depressed.
Um.
I really didn't have any response to that.
I mean, I'm not always the most cheery person or anything, but I prefer not to advertise my "dark side" on a first date. Not so for this joe.
We bit farewell and he said he hoped to hear from me.
Sorry dude, think you might have to enjoy being depressed in New York all by yourself.....

Eastern European Guy.
He was a persistent bugger.
Online guy....emailed me. Didn't email him back. Emailed me again months later when I was feeling a tad more generous. Met him for a drink at a cafe in the East village. He was a lot pastier and pudgier and older looking in person.
We had a conversation about how he came to New York while he sipped a soda and I (of course), the date wine. Wine-oooooooooo.
ahem.
His story about how he arrived in the big, cold city was impressive. He put himself through college and has been moderately successful in his career. My hat off to him. That is all I would ever take off for him.
NEXT!




Laugh Out Loud Guy.
Customary drink. He reminded me of a robot. Only, robots don't have abbrasive luck "YUK YUK, BA HA HA HAAAAAAA" laughs.
Oy.
He asked me what I did for fun....
This was in the throes of finals, first semester in my Masters Program, so I told him I wasn't really having a lot of fun these days, but mostly concentrating on getting my work done. What did he expect? Me to describe a sexy romp through my apartment wearing only my lacy little.......In response, Laugh Out Loud Guy told me I needed more balance in my life...work hard, play hard. That was his motto (gasp! how original). "Yuk Yuk Yuk!!!!" Then continued with telling me that if I didn't get out and enjoy life, I'd be boring and old before I knew it! "Yuka Yuka Yuk Yuk!!!"
Uh.
Okay.
Downed glass of wine and got the f**k outta there.

Weirdo WHAT???

This is a guy who emailed me online and then we continued to write on and off in our regular emails. After a bit he wasn't making any move to meet up, so I stopped writing him back. I mean, c'mon. Don't waste my time dude.
Enough of the unavailables, the guys trying to get over their ex-girlfriends, trying to figure out if they are straight or like the dick as much as I..........

So, after not corresponding for a couple months, dude emails me again. I decide to give him a second chance because he seemed ....interesting. Below are the last emails we exchanged. Guys confuse me.......my comments in red.


Hi ___(my name here)__,

Sorry for the delinquency.... things kinda nutso..what id give for a one-month break. i really need to get out of the country for a real vacay.....(You are really a woman and hence use these "feminized" abbreviations as a substitute for the actual word)

my nyrs....I went to Miami for this annual party. well, as I mentioned awhile back, I was doing long-distance thang (how very casual seeming you are trying to be) for a year since moving to NYC -- and that relationship ended around October.....So, I was so not looking for anything and very much enjoying being single and in the City. girls here are the most aggressive ive ever seen...it is NUTS. (Really? Wow, lucky guy. Odds are if we met you'd find out I'm the least aggressive girl....because I wouldn't want you to get the idea I actually was attracted to you)

So, what happens to me? I met a girl over thanksgiving in Miami (through friends and at a party) who lives IN new york....so yah, I was doing the single thing but things evolved w/ this girl and we wound up spending new year's in Miami and it has only gotten more serious from there. (Huh?) Boy, I did NOT see that coming especially since I was living it up and that serious relationship w/ my gf in Miami was actually the first serious one I had in a decade. ok, you probably think I am bananas or something...anyhow, kinda batty and all that....on the one hand, I was doubting whether I gave myself enough time to explore the city and all these amazing girls here (including what seems like yourself), but on the other hand, things with this girl seemed right...oddly, she got out of a very serious relationship back in July, she is around my age (a first for me....my ex-gf in Miami was a decade younger than me - not that it matters) and we have the same group of friends (though we oddly never met...mainly b/c she has been in NYC and before that chitown).....phew. anyhow, as you can see, it has been a whirlwhind few months on the Weirdo WHAT front. (Uh, why are you telling me ALL THIS? Why not let it go, like when I stopped writing you back? Why do you feel a need to share this with me? We are not friends. I don't know you. I don't care about what you do unless it's meant to benefit MOI. Like, c'mon!)

i literally dont correspond w/ one person from online....not even kidding. but you seem pretty cool. i do hope we can still talk and maybe meet up....im extremely honest to a fault...(To a fault, yes. And weird. Why do you think I want to know about this other girl you're now dating? In case you were wondering.....I don't).

Weirdo What

This is my response:


Thanks for being so open - appreciated.

That said, I don't understand why you want to keep up contact with me if you are currently dating someone who you really like. Obviously, we've never met and are not already friends.......
I'll put it this way - I'm interested in meeting and getting to know guys who are available. And from what you've shared, you are not.

So, it was nice to (almost) meet you.
take care,
Me.

---------

Wow. I impress myself with my restraint and elegance when dealing with actual people.

Well, this is just another example of the pieces of fake sh-t I come up with, searching in the pot for pieces of gold........